Parenting has set of behavior patterns. The styles weren’t defined until it was researched by the psychologist Diana Baumrind (Baumrind, 1967). She used observation and interviews to do her research. She found four major patterns of parenting styles. They are categorised based on the behaviour patterns, they are
- Authoritarian
- Authoritative
- Permissive
- Uninvolved
Let us look at how the child’s behaviour and personality gets affected based on the parent’s behavior.
Authoritarian Parenting (Strict/Harsh)
In this style of parenting, parents will give the instructions to the child and expect them to be followed without questioning. The mindset of the parent is my way or highway. I am telling you, so you do it. Parent will be very harsh and strict in enforcing the rules and discipline. There is very less room for the child to ask and know why the rules have been set.
Parent may get the immediate results of enforcement or compliance. Long-term impact of this style of parenting on child is not very encouraging.
Child may be obedient without asking questions. Child may exhibit the unsociable behaviour. He or she may be less friendly. May be withdrawn and unhappy. Child may not be very creative, because never utilised the power of creativity and questioning. Child might sees everything and everyone being unfair. May be complaining about unfairness a lot. Ultimate damage could be, child end up developing lower self-esteem and lower self confidence. This is very dangerous.
What You Can Do?
If you find these symptoms in your child, reflect yourself on what you or the caregiver, might have behaved with the child to cause such an impact. Start small steps of corrections in building the self confidence and self esteem of the child. These are key ingredients of success in today’s competitive world.
If the child is not asking questions and not being creative, then start conversation with the child to develop the skills of questioning. Encourage the questioning of the child. Let the child feel safe to ask questions. Also encourage child to share ideas and be creative. If you encourage child to ask questions & share ideas, over a period, child will be equipped with these skills.
Authoritative Parenting (Responsible/Caring)
Authoritative parent usually sets limits and boundaries. She Will be firm with her approach. These parents encourage independence & allow open communication. They resolve conflicts through discussion.
Children usually turn out to be confident, caring, independent, creative, thoughtful, feels secure & takes risks. They also mix well with others. They tend to resolve their conflict between friends.
What You Can Do?
This is an ideal parenting style, as this influences positively on the child. If you are an authoritative parent, continue to be that, unless situation demands otherwise.
Permissive Parenting (Lenient)
With this parenting style, parents don’t demand much from their child. They are inconsistent and have fewer expectations from their child. These parents use gifts or toys to make the child comply to the behaviour they want the child to follow. Parents behave more like a friend rather than a parent.
Children may develop low self-control; they become impulsive, immature, unable to take decisions, not very much successful at school or academics. When they become adults, they might experience problems with people who are in authority.
What You Can Do?
You can start setting boundaries. If you have realized your style before your child turned teen, you will have lesser conflicts, changing your style. You can read more about changing the parenting style in this article.
Uninvolved Parenting (Neglectful/Careless)
These parents are emotionally very less involved with the children. They believe that parents are responsible for providing physical comforts like food, shelter and clothing.
Children may become indifferent, have low self control and may not be very successful at school. These children may become rebellious & they may become unsuccessful in academics.
Let us also look at the various child behavior patterns those influence a child behavior corresponding to the parenting style in the figure.
Summary
You learnt how the parenting style shapes the child behavior. Ideally Responsible parenting style is better as it gives space for child to express and experience. It also brings out the best out of your child.
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